Forward Progress :: Mike Neir's Page

Ever since I started having relationship troubles with Jessica a month or so ago, the contemplation center of my brain (yah I made that up) has been on overdrive. Before we called it quits and while I was still in the dark about the origins of the situation, that contemplation was focused on the relationship - what I could have done wrong, possible reasons Jessica was being so distant, where I may have fell short. The latter list got uncomfortably long, actually. I couldn't stop thinking about the situation, day or night. I was useless at work, miserable at home, and couldn't sleep for shit. It was terribly unhealthy for me.

Since we've broken up, I've still been contemplating things, but I'm trying to direct that contemplation inward. I've been trying to focus on ways that I can move forward and improve myself. I've realized a good number of things about myself that I'm not happy with and that I'd like to change. While pondering some of these things, it dawned on me that except for a scant few things, I've never really had any concrete goals in my life. Sure, there are things I want to do - some of them I do, some I don't. I've never really made any sort of outline for things that I want to accomplish, however. Because of this, I feel that I have just sort of coasted through life instead of really living it. That's something I want to change.

To help me accomplish this, I've decided to add a page here that lists the things I'd like to see come to fruition in my life. It's divided into general timeframes, each of which is sorted by importance. It's my hope that keeping this list out in the open will help keep my goals from being forgotten, and that it will help keep me honest. Right now it's just a list, but I've been considering adding in some functionality for stuff like tracking milestones, or the ability to create a link between content posts and goals to document my progress. That may come one day, but not tonight. I had to create pages to add and edit the goals, which is incredibly tedious for me, and has sapped my motivation to continue further... for now.

kristen e. :: 09/14/2007, 12:58 pm :: Reply

hey mike,

i haven't commented here in ages, but i still read your blog. i'm never on myspace anymore; dan and i have had some trouble with his crazy ex, so we've been staying away from there. anyway.

i think it's really cool that you're working on yourself and your goals. not enough people do that. it sucks that you and your girl broke up, but it seems that you're able to take that experience and make yourself a better person for it, which is great. so *hugs* and good for you. :)

-formerly krissy (which i ALWAYS hated!)

Mike Neir :: 09/14/2007, 2:35 pm :: Reply

Don't sweat the commenting thing... It sounds like you've been quite busy over the past few months with planning for the wedding and moving and all.

Yah, it does stink that we broke up, and it certainly hasn't been easy for me, but I still think it's for the best. We're two people in different places in our lives with different views on where we want to go. Neither is right or wrong. In the long term, as I see it, things just wouldn't have worked. Because of that, it makes me glad that we could call it quits amicably, and continue to be friends.

So, in short... I'm just trying to stay positive and make myself a better person. We'll see if it works out or not, but I'm hopeful. :)

Paul :: 09/14/2007, 7:31 pm :: Reply

What already giving up on the goal of world domination? You quitter.

Mike Neir :: 09/14/2007, 10:23 pm :: Reply

That one's marked as a secret goal. I can't just go advertising it until I'm ready... duh!

Jonny K :: 09/17/2007, 7:54 pm :: Reply

Very introspective Mike, I'm proud of you. Up until about a year ago I kind of coasted along like you were talking about. You'd be amazed how much you learn about yourself when you actually pay attention to your own behavior and that of those around you. Making a list is fine, but I wouldn't go making a milestones chart. That makes it too much like the working world. But hey, if that helps you out then by all means do it.

Hey Kristen, I hope you check this again. I'd love to give Dan a call but I don't have the right phone number. Hope all is well with you guys (other than the crazy ex situation which he told me about over a year ago; insane that it's still going on).

kristen :: 09/18/2007, 10:51 pm :: Reply

hey, jon! sorry i didn't see this sooner; i've been SO busy with the wedding! there have been all sorts of changes in our lives lately (like moving to california, planning a wedding, etc., no stress at all!) and i'm sure dan would love to talk with you! send me an email: my first initial and last name, all one word, at gmail dot com. i'll pass along the new phone number!

Jonny K :: 09/19/2007, 4:41 pm :: Reply

Kristen,

Awesome, I'll send you an email.

Mike Neir :: 09/19/2007, 11:04 pm :: Reply

Mike Neir's Page - reuniting old friends since 1997!

Michael :: 09/18/2007, 8:05 pm :: Reply

This sounds similar to something I read on another blog, 1001 items in 1001 days. I've been feeling the need to do something similar myself, must be the weather.