Sunday, January 13 2008, 11:40 PM

Once again, I have reason to be unhappy with myself. Don't worry though mom, I'm fine. I'm not going to go into it here, but it has once again served as motivation to get shit done. I've been playing the guitar a good amount over the past few days, and I feel like I'm starting to get some of my chops back. I've learned a few new songs, including one that I wrote off years back because I thought it was too fast for me to play ("Trapped Under Ice" by Metallica). It's always cool to pull off something you had previously written off. I also hit the exercise bike again tonight for the first time in a while. I found the key - reading! It makes the time pass so much faster. I might run out of reading material pretty quick though. I'm going to try to do my best to stick with it this time as well.

I also made a pretty cool monitor mount that attaches to my desk. I'll post some pictures when I feel like resizing them. Perhaps tomorrow.

exercise frustrations goals guitar

Monday, December 17 2007, 1:35 AM

Reconnect with my guitar - Accomplished! I've been playing pretty regularly over the past few months, and have learned a few songs along the way. I've had the Carvin strung up baritone-style, which has helped learn some In Flames, Dethklok, and Unearth songs. I've added another goal in the Ongoing section to make sure I keep playing.

Buying a house - Yah, that one hasn't done anywhere. My lease is up at the end of the year, so there's no way I'm going to make that happen. I've shifted it to a Medium-Term goal, since I'll probably renew here for another year and give myself the opportunity to look for a place at a more relaxed pace.

Being social - I was doing pretty well with this one for a while, but have been reverting a bit recently. Boo.

Everything else has stayed pretty flat, without much progress or improvement.

That is all.

goals

Friday, September 14 2007, 1:23 AM

Ever since I started having relationship troubles with Jessica a month or so ago, the contemplation center of my brain (yah I made that up) has been on overdrive. Before we called it quits and while I was still in the dark about the origins of the situation, that contemplation was focused on the relationship - what I could have done wrong, possible reasons Jessica was being so distant, where I may have fell short. The latter list got uncomfortably long, actually. I couldn't stop thinking about the situation, day or night. I was useless at work, miserable at home, and couldn't sleep for shit. It was terribly unhealthy for me.

Since we've broken up, I've still been contemplating things, but I'm trying to direct that contemplation inward. I've been trying to focus on ways that I can move forward and improve myself. I've realized a good number of things about myself that I'm not happy with and that I'd like to change. While pondering some of these things, it dawned on me that except for a scant few things, I've never really had any concrete goals in my life. Sure, there are things I want to do - some of them I do, some I don't. I've never really made any sort of outline for things that I want to accomplish, however. Because of this, I feel that I have just sort of coasted through life instead of really living it. That's something I want to change.

To help me accomplish this, I've decided to add a page here that lists the things I'd like to see come to fruition in my life. It's divided into general timeframes, each of which is sorted by importance. It's my hope that keeping this list out in the open will help keep my goals from being forgotten, and that it will help keep me honest. Right now it's just a list, but I've been considering adding in some functionality for stuff like tracking milestones, or the ability to create a link between content posts and goals to document my progress. That may come one day, but not tonight. I had to create pages to add and edit the goals, which is incredibly tedious for me, and has sapped my motivation to continue further... for now.

This is where I start moving forward.

contemplation goals relationships

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